Lots of news this week, so it’s time to share some major news you won’t read anywhere else (for reasons that will soon become apparent).
RUN, FORREST, RUN: I can confirm that I am not seeking the Liberal Party of Canada leadership. This shocker comes amid revelations that officials from the party have approached me to run. Even though I can’t speak French and don’t have the $350,000 entry fee, they surmised I could screw things up as well as anyone else (or were those Conservative officials who approached me?)
51st STATE OF DENIAL: Fear not, fellow Canadians, we will not become the 51st American state. Apparently, we have too few guns per capita to qualify.
CANADA LEARNS ABOUT B.C. LIBERALS: Former B.C. premier and now possible Liberal leadership candidate Christy Clark says she’s a lifelong Liberal. For everyone outside B.C. – yes, she was a member, MLA and eventual leader of the B.C. Liberal Party, ascending to the premiership. But everyone here knows our Liberals weren’t really liberals, they were really conservatives but couldn’t use the name Conservative because Gordon Campbell, a conservative, stole the B.C. Liberal Party from Gordon Wilson, a liberal, and couldn’t change the name to Conservative because that name was already taken by … other conservatives.
Years later, fed up with people thinking BC Liberals were actually liberal, they changed their name to the BC United Party and subsequently evaporated as the BC Conservative Party attracted conservatives because … well, it’s less complicated.
FOOT IN MOUTH DISEASE: Speaking of Clark, she went on CBC the other day and was adamant she has never had a federal Conservative Party membership. The CBC, obviously not in the employ of Facebook, fact-checked the assertion and the Conservative Party gleefully produced a receipt showing Clark indeed had purchased a membership.
For some, having belonged to different political parties is a sin beyond redemption. I don’t see that as a problem. People change. Just because I purchased a gym membership in the ‘90s doesn’t mean I’m still in shape today (OK, I wasn’t in shape in the ‘90s either, but you get the point).
I’m also of the age where I can be forgiven for using my phone to Google ‘where’s my phone?’ I don’t think Clark’s quite at that age yet so forgetting she had purchased a Conservative membership is, well … troublesome.
SCARE THE PIERRE: Federal Conservative Party leader Pierre Poilievre, when asked what his response to president-elect Donald Trump’s threat of a 25 per cent tariff on Canadian goods said because he isn’t the prime minister he doesn’t have the “moral authority” to comment.
Wait a minute! Poilievre has morals? Didn’t see that one coming.
CANADA’S NEVILLE CHAMBERLAINS: The recent parade of federal and provincial politicians to Mar-A-Lago to appease Trump is reminiscent of a time long ago that every year we promise to “never forget.” Former UK Prime Minister Neville Chamberlain is infamous (for those who study history) for travelling to Germany to meet with Adolph Hitler shortly before the Second World War. Chamberlain returned, waved a piece of paper in the air and proclaimed: “Peace in our time.” Hitler, who signed the said piece of paper promising peace, promptly bombed the bejeesus out of most of Europe.
I fear our appeasement efforts will also fall on deaf ears.
HAPPY BIRTHDAY: Former Prime Minister Jean Chretien turned 91 years old this week. To celebrate he penned a piece in the Globe and Mail showing that he is still the best person to lead the federal Liberals and the country.
One thought on “All the news that isn’t fit to print”
Excellent article!